Wednesday, June 20, 2007

More on my life

How do you know if you've made the right decisions? I'm on the verge of another relationship, this one with someone that actually shows me and tells me that he cares for me. All the time. And while it's nice, we've had conversations about his need to put me on a pedestal and my feelings of complete inadequacy in being on one. Here I thought it would be nice to be with someone that seems to care about me unconditionally, but it still feels wrong. Maybe it's just because I'm not used to being shown this much attention. Or having my boyfriend close to tears by the mere thought that he's upset me somehow.

We're on the verge of moving in together. I'm thinking that hurdle is what prompted my uneasiness to creep back into view. To say that I'm cynical about relationships would be like saying it gets a LITTLE humid in Florida in the summer. I've expressed to him that I don't think ANY relationship I'm in will end any different than any of my past. Even though HE isn't like anyone I've dated, is that enough of a variable to keep this relationship going? My head tells me it isn't. My heart is hoping like hell that it is.